Monday, February 02, 2009

I'm never taking a shower again.

Because I have two choices - let The Baby in with me or lock him out in the hallway.

If I let him in with me I have to to everything twice.
I wash my hair, I wash his hair.
I condition my hair, I condition his hair.
I shave my legs, I have to pretend to shave his legs.
It takes forever and I'm in ice water by the time I do my final rinse.

So the second choice is to lock him out.
And then I get kicking, banging, screaming and then silence.
It's the silence that bothers me most.

Because he's off doing something like dumping a box of pancake
mix onto the table to play in.

Apparently he thought he should make his own sand pit in the dining room.

He also got a pitcher of orange juice from the fridge and poured it into this lawnmower, that he stole from a neighbor. He wanted gas in the gas tank.

In case you aren't familiar, orange juice is a ridiculous sticky mess to clean up.
But the pancake mix was much worse. It's the kind that says "just add water".
Well you know what that means? It turns to a horrible paste when I try to clean it!
Awful sticky horrible mess.

So I'm never taking a shower again, unless The Man is home to watch The Baby.
If you know me in real life and I start to reek, I apologize.
Talk to The Man and tell him to be home more often so I can be clean.


Unknown said...

THAT'S WHY I STINK 90% of the time mostly when The Captain is away. It's even worse with 4-they do SERIOUS DAMAGE :)

Jennifer Ladd said...

I feel terrible for you, because I know exactly what that is like! But I can't help it ... I'm laughing so hard at those pictures. Pancake mix ... oh boy! I'm so dreading the day my daughter grows tall enough to reach stiff like that in our house!

Mrs.Kwitty said...

Lol!!! Oh, what a little stinker! It's a good thing he's so dang cute.....
Smiles, Karen

Mrs.Kwitty said...

Oh, I have to share! My friend stepped out of the shower once to find that her 2 little darlings had decided to paint the walls with peanut butter and jelly---using her tampons as paintbrushes!! lol

Beki - TheRustedChain said...

Bahahaha Karen!!!!
That is so funny!!

Funktional Threads said...

Oh no, I have to admit I was laughing out loud reading of his antics. Of course I was also feeling tremendous empathy for you. I totally know the feeling about not being able to shower in peace. When my daughter was that age, I usually showered late at night when she was asleep. That was about the only time I could do so without interruption. Luckily she never considered pantry items as a good source for 'sandbox' play. Mostly she'd assume she was invited to join me in the shower as soon as I turned on the water.

Unknown said...

Ah! What a mixture of deep sympathy and high amusement this post affords!

God bless you. A lot.
And somehow I still look forward to the day I'm in those shoes myself.

BlenderBach said...

oh no! I can't help but laugh - and those pictures are too cute!

InTheFastLane said...

Silence is deadly. when I am home, I try to let JJ watch TV, while I shower. But, I still have to be very quick. The other day he moved a stool into my closet and was trying to climb up my clothes to get into the attic.

Tarasview said...

oh I am SO with you!!! My daughter will NOT allow me even to PEE by myself. Nope. Not even maybe.


Stinkers 'R' Us Unite :)

melissa said...

OMG, Becky! What a cute lil stinker!


~just breathe

CocoJ126 said...

i feel you!!! showers have gotten easier around here...i can see through the shower glass into the garden tub...and i can get up make-uped and fix hair before he wants to get out! ! ! why didn't i try this 3 months ago?

And You've been tagged:

The Rules:1. Go to your Picture Folder on your computer or wherever you store your pictures.2. Go to the 6th Folder, then pick the 6th picture in that folder.3. Post that picture on your blog and the story that goes along with the picture.4. Tag 6 other people that you know or don’t know to do the same thing and leave a comment on their blog or an e-mail letting them know you chose them

Have fun!


rebel said...

Boy, have I forgotten what it's like to have a little one around, but you've brought it all back, vividly! He sure is a cute little boy. Good thing you like him, huh?

KrazyCricutKid said...

HAHAHA! I know what you mean! My showers now have to take place at 630am when my husband wakes up, just so that I can pop in and out.

Or if I feel like getting an extra 20 minutes of sleep, they take place with the door open. I have a bin of toys under the sink that are bath toys, books, and other random new toys that are only for playing with while mommy is in the shower and the kids can sit on the floor of the bathroom and play. It's COLD, with the open door, but it makes for a longer than 2 minute shower!

Lisa Holman of XSBaggage and Co. said...

That is soooo funny!! (sorry, but it just is!) :D What's also funny is that your reaction to it was to get out your camera and take pictures of it. And I'm glad you did, it made me laugh!

Hana said...

Oh no...what an awful mess! Why do moms have to jump through hoops just to get something as simple as a shower?! I know how it is...I wait till the hubby is home before I get one. Aaahhh, the joys of motherhood!

The Stewart Stuff said...

You poor thing! This too shall pass....I promise! These will make great memories to tease him about once he starts dating! :-P

Melanie @ Whimsical Creations said...

That is too funny! Thank god my daughter (age 2) can't get into the kitchen, i can only imagine. I do have to take her with me to the bathroom....good-bye to peeing in peace. When my son was little I started taking a shower 1st thing when I got up. This way daddy got to have fun with the kids. =P

Unknown said...

OMG....I hate to laugh...but I'm just going to have to. Obviously you see the humor in this or your wouldn't have posted it. This phase shall pass and you'll be wishing to The Baby's antics again. uhhh....maybe!?!?? Anyway, he's TOO cute and obviously has your creative touch!

Unknown said...

Ahh, I remember those days! And of course the guys just don't understand how hard it really is! Give it a few years and you'll be able to shower alone again!

Anonymous said...

heehee! During nap time?

kraftykash said...

Oh that is too funny! Its the little things we take for being clean! :)

The Beauty Bargainista said...

ohhhh my goodness! All I can say is thank you LORD that Lagan is 7! hehe

Cthings said...

Wow you have a very creative kid there!! I don't think I could keep up with that. Good luck for private time!

Vanessa and Company said...

I almost spit out my coffee, I was laughing so hard!
I can totally relate though...I have perfected the "under 5 minute" shower, since I've had kids. I always count it as a "luxury" when the hubs is home, and I can actually shave my legs and exfoliate while showering...woo-hoo!
Thanks for the laugh this morning :)

gina said...

lol. I don't mean to laugh at your pain but geez- he's hardcore- pancake mix and oj? Could it get any worse?!???

Anonymous said...

Oh soooooo cute and so funny!! Sigh. Those were the days! My little boy who is now 25 used to be just like that!!
Hope you have a great day!!

Lori R said...

Umm, yeah. There was the time mine dumped out the powdered green tempera on the kitchen floor. You know, the kind you mix with water to make paint. I swept, then mopped to pick up the last remnants. Bad idea. I had green grout for a very long time.

forever folding laundry said...

Showers are very dangerous, aren't they! I can't remember the last time my shower was longer than 4.2 minutes, for fear that the house will look like a tornado went through by the time I get out! I feel your pain.

Jus Shar Designs said...

He's innocent I tell ya!

Unknown said...

ha! yeah, like someone said before he *is* hardcore. it's sad to laugh, but i love that he just took the lawnmower and the look he has in the photo.

Morgan said...


Love the "gas" in the tank and the way his tongue is lolling out in that pic!

He and Piper could conquer the world together, heheh.