Tuesday, October 09, 2012

Blogging and ewwy-blogging.

Somewhere recently I saw something that struck me.

(I'm sorry I don't know the original author.)
"I miss old style blogging.Back when bloggers participated in things b/c they were interested in them.Not 4 blatant self-promotion."

Agreed. I've been blogging since 2006 and things have really changed.
And, being the graceful and always tactful lady that I am (*snort*!), here are some of my thoughts based on the above statement.

I've felt weird about blogging & bloggers lately. There's so much worship and adoration thrown toward some; it makes me uncomfortable.

I've become more reserved on my blog because I DON'T want the gushing comments. I don't want to appear "perfect" when I'm very real.

So many blogs seem very narcissistic. "Notice Me. Gush over me. Send me gifts and I'll blog about you." It's just all ... ewwy.

I don't want this to be the Beki Show all the time. It's not about me.
Don't get me wrong, I'm as nosy as anyone I've ever met. I LOVE peeking into lives of others.
And as a very bluntly honest person, I'll share bits of my life... the good and not so good.
But I go back to my friend Mandy Young's slogan - My Life Is Not About Me.

Blogging, particularly for Christian women, can be such a great tool of inspiration. But the adoring fans make me uncomfortable. (clearly I don't have tons of them myself, just noticing adoring fans toward others.)

Of course it's fun to get lots of blog comments. It's fun to have people tell us how beautiful we are, funny we are, amazingly talented we are, to get recognized in public, to have people send random gifts in the mail...
It's fun to have our ego stroked.
It's human nature.
But shouldn't our focus be elsewhere? Shouldn't it be on making the world a better place?
Should we be teaching, preaching, loving, comforting, and inspiring others?
Shouldn't people leave our blogs feeling better, not worse? How many times have you read someone's blog and left thinking you weren't as good as her? That you wish you could be like her?
You Are.

Bloggers can use their platform in a positive way. What benefit do the readers get?
Do they leave with laughter? Comfort? Inspiration? Are you thought provoking?
Blog readers have to realize that the writer is just a real person, a sinner by nature, with plenty of flaws.
What you see on the blog is only a tiny sliver of real life, even if the blog writer doesn't portray it that way.
If we're going to worship someone, let it be the God who created us and all the beauty around us.

I want to see blogs be about making the world better, through God, laughter, beauty, & love. Not gathering adoring fans.

I enjoy blogging.
I enjoy the photos and story telling. The journaling.
Being able to look back on my pages and have memories jarred.
But deep inside, I don't want it to just be about me. It's not just MY space.
I want it to trigger something in others. Raise questions. Create a warm relatability. Inspire dreams. Challenge talents. Create laughs. Be a place for a 5 minute rest during a day.
WHATEVER it does, I don't want it to just be about me. I want it to DO something.
I want to be leaving a legacy, reflecting God.
I want to be blogging (and blog reading) without the ewwy-ness of the jazz hands and the "Beki Show", notice me, clap for me feeling.

Does that even make sense?


Ellyn said...

yes. it makes perfect sense. I totally agree

Non-Stop Mom said...

It makes absolute perfect sense, and I feel the same way. So many of my blogging friends have fallen into the trap of sponsored posts and giveaways and glitter and sparkle and jazz hands - and it's just not my thing. I write about our lives - the good and the bad. It's a journal of what we do on a daily basis, and sometimes it's about nothing at all. I don't have a huge amount of people following me, and I'm ok with that.

I was just having this discussion with a group of bloggers the other day when they were talking about how it is "wrong" to center pictures on posts, and instead the pictures should be to one side or the other with the text wrapped around them - and I asked where that "rule" was written - no one could answer me.

Bottom line is - I write for me, and to have a journal for my kids to read someday. I've been through a lot to get to where I am now, and if I can help someone else along the way, great.

Sorry - didn't mean to hijack with a long-winded comment! You just caught me thinking about the same subject!


Karrie S Combs said...

well said! i agree 100%

Brittany SSP said...

I understand your point, and agree to a certain extent. It's definitely frustrating when a blog becomes more about giveaways and material things in my opinion. Or when there are more "guest posts" than the blog author you actually signed up to read.

As far as a blog not being all about someone, though- that's basically why I started my blog! It's a journal for me, about me, what I'm thinking and feeling in my life. Not in an egotistical "I'm awesome" way-the opposite, actually, it's a place where I "talk" through my struggles. I don't think having a personal blog where someone discusses personal issues is automatically narcissistic. There is a lot to be gained by saying "Hey I'm dealing with X and it's difficult" because THAT can also be an inspiration to others in the same position.

Beki - TheRustedChain said...

Brittany, yes! And in doing that you are creating a warm relatability.. inspiring them. You're not posting those things just to grab attention. :)

Jana said...

Totally agree! If I really knew the people behind those blogs, I don't think I would be friends with them in real life---I like the blogs that make me laugh and show the crazy side of life--it makes me feel normal!

Ruth said...

I have been an adoring fan ever since... hmm. Maybe when we agreed ice cream can get stuffed in favour of salty carbs? Love what you're saying. Love your blog for seeming so 'you'. Keep it up :) (and pass the guacamole)

.....Elizabeth..... Polka Dot Skies said...

I agree with you! The blogs I love most are written by people I think I could be friends with in real life. Folks I would love to have coffee and a good chat with!
I'm following many blogs (and can't seem to remove them from my blogroll) that I liked at first until I realized the writer is just putting on a show.
Thank you for being a real person! I truly get inspiration from reading your blog because you are a mama who loves God and is trying to do the best she can in this world for him and her family and friends.

Danielle said...

I LOVE the statement "My life is not about me". Great perspective!

And I love you! I love that you are real, honest and imperfect. God has used you so many times to touch my life. Thanks for being my friend :)

Bonky's Mom said...


Bonky's Mom said...


Alisha said...

Makes perfect sense and makes me second guess MY blogging. I've been tootin' my own horn as of late which reflects poorly upon myself. Shame on me. Thank you for the wakeup call!

I for one, LOVE your blog. You ARE inspiring and very REAL!!! And I completely GET what you mean about the "Me Show". I've quit reading several blogs because it seems that's all it is. Kind of oogie.

And then...I catch myself doing it.

So, thanks again for the reminder. You're pretty awesome.

Patty Sumner said...

It makes perfect sense...Yes, blogging has changed over the past years. I hope that in all I do the Lord gets the glory when that is your focus, you will be limited on followers and those who will take time to read. Keep on giving HIM the glory! Blessings!

Leslie Veer said...

Sometimes I think the problem is with the blog followers. They put a blogger on a pedestal when the blogger never intended that to happen. We have an issue with "celebrity" in our society, even on a minor level.

elizabeth said...

I think you're right, and desire to be a real and honest blogger that encourages others and points them to Jesus.

Christina said...

What I like about your blog (and, really, most of the blogs I read) is how authentic you are. :) I love the pics and the life in the country (so different from my own). I have often thought,"Beki is someone I want to have over.) I'd have to pick up my house in a major way! Ha! I recently had to rethink why I blog. I would get bummed about lack of comments, etc. But, I decided that I want to blog so that my family can have a sense of what's going on (they're not in town), and hopefully to make others laugh. Mostly. It's good to think about these things, to think about motivations and goals. Thanks for the great reminders!!

Melinda said...

Well. I will say that I started blogging to give me a distraction from my husband's layoff and it helped! Yes it is about Me and hime , my job and my hobbies but I feel that those who come to visist leave happy and look forward to coming back to see what we are up to now.
I have a good amount of Followers and I am pretty godd with that.
I agree with Elizabeth--in that I blog with those that I feel I could be friends with if we lived closer to each other instead of long distance friends.
I like blogging because I HAVE met alot of wonderful people that I never would have met otherwise.
What you see on my blog is what you would see in real life.

M :)

HeARTworks said...

I love blogging because I am able to grow beyond my comfort zone. I'm hoping to put more of me in my blog! So I'm just the opposite of the blogs you've been talking about!!!! I guess I'm just uncomfortable talking about me- maybe I think I'm boring!!! I struggle with finding something interesting to write about! And I hide behind my art! Patsy from

Jerlyn said...

I agree. You help me to see the hand of God in our lives, help me to take a step back and look at the positive, and really see all the wonderfully good hinges in our world. Thanks for being real.